书城外语发现花未眠
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第26章 那是一棵生命的常青树 (12)

On the afternoon of that eventful day, I stood on the porch, dumb, expectant. I guessed vaguely from my mother' s signs and from the hurrying to and fro in the house that something unusual was about to happen, so I went to the door and waited on the steps. The afternoon sun penetrated the mass of honeysuckle that covered the porch, and fell on my upturned face. My fingers fingered almost unconsciously on the familiar leaves and blossoms which had just come forth to greet the sweet southern spring. I did not know what the future held of marvel or surprise for me. Anger and bitterness had preyed upon me continually and a deep languor had succeeded this passionate struggle.

Have you ever been at sea in a dense fog, when it seemed as if a tangible white darkness shut you in, and the great ship, tense and anxious, groped her way toward the shore with plummet and sounding-line, and you waited with beating heart for something to happen? I was like that ship before my education began, only I was without compass or sounding-line, and had no way of knowing how near the harbour was. " Light! Give me light!" was the wordless cry of my oil, and the light of love shone on me in that very tour.

I felt approaching footsteps, I stretched out my hand as I supposed to my mother. Some one took it, and I was caught up and held close in the arms of her who had come to reveal all things to me, and, more than all things else, to love me.

The morning after my teacher came she led me into her room and gave me a doll. The little blind children at the Perkins Institution had sent it and Laura Bridgman had dressed it; but I did not know this until afterward. When I had played with it a little while, Miss Sullivan slowly spelled into my hand the word "d-o-l-l". I was at once interested in this finger play and tried to imitate it. When I finally succeeded in making the letters correctly I was flushed with childish pleasure and pride. Running downstairs to my mother I held up my hand and made the letters for doll. I did not know that I was spelling a word or even that words existed; I was simply making my fingers go in monkey-like imitation. In the days that followed I learned to spell in this uncomprehending way a great many words, among them pin, hat, cup and a few verbs like sit, stand and walk. But my teacher had been with me several weeks before I understood that everything has a name.

One day, while I was playing with my new doll, Miss Sullivan put my big rag doll into my lap also, spelled "d-o-l-l" and tried to make me understand that "d-o-l-l" applied to both. Earlier in the day we had had a tussle over the words "m-u-g" and "w-a-t-e-r." Miss Sullivan had tried to impress it upon me that "m-u-g" is mug and that "w-a-t-e-r" is water, but I persisted in confounding the two. In despair she had dropped the subject for the time, only to renew it at the first opportunity. I became impatient at her repeated attempts and, seizing the new doll, I dashed it upon the floor. I was keenly delighted when I felt the fragments of the broken doll at my feet. Neither sorrow nor regret followed my passionate outburst. I had not loved the doll. In the still, dark world in which I lived there was no strong sentiment or tenderness. I felt my teacher sweep the fragments to one side of the hearth, and I had a sense of satisfaction that the cause of my discomfort was removed. She brought me my hat, and I knew I was going out into the warm sunshine. This thought, if a wordless sensation may be called a thought, made me hop and skip with pleasure.

We walked down the path to the well-house, attracted by the fragrance of the honeysuckle with which it was covered. Some one was drawing water and my teacher placed my hand under the spout. As the cool stream gushed over one hand she spelled into the other the word water, first slowly, then rapidly. I stood still, my whole attention fixed upon the motions of her fingers. Suddenly I felt a misty consciousness as of something forgotten — a thrill of returning thought: and somehow the mystery of language was revealed to me. I knew then that "w-a-t-e-r" meant the wonderful cool something that was flowing over my hand. That living word awakened my soul, gave it light, hope, joy, set it free! There were barriers still, it is true, but barriers that could in time be swept away.

我有生以来最重要的一天,就是安妮·曼斯菲尔德·莎莉文老师来到我身边的那天。那是1887年3月3日,还差三个月我就七岁了。从这一天起,我将开始全新的生活,一想到这儿,我的心中满是惊奇。

那个重要日子的午后,我站在走廊上,一声不吭,满怀期待。从母亲的手势和其他人忙来忙去的样子,我隐约感到要有不同寻常的事情发生。于是,我来到门口,站在台阶上默默地期待着。午后的阳光穿透覆盖在门廊上的一大片金银花,洒在我微微仰起的脸上。我的手指不?意间触到那熟知的花叶上——南方的花朵绽放着来ó接可爱的春天。我不清楚自己的未来会有什么惊喜和奇迹,愤?和苦痛折磨了我已有一段时间,这种?历过后,我感到心力交瘁。

朋友,你是否曾在茫茫大雾的情况下,还在海上航行?如同一层可以触摸到的白色黑暗将你包围,大船凭借着测深锤和探深绳,紧张忧虑地在大海中探索着上岸的道路。你的心怦怦直跳,期待这将要发生的一切?在我没有接受教育之前,我就如同这样的航船,只不过我既没有指南针,也没有探深绳,无法知道距离岸边还有多远。“光明!光明!快给我光明!”我在心灵深处无声地呼喊。刚好在此时,爱的光明照耀到我的身上。

我听到有脚步向我走来。本以为是母亲,我便马上伸出双手。有个人握住了我的手,把我紧紧地拥在怀里。她就是让我领悟世界万物的人,更重要的是她给予了我爱。