"Is there nothing else you can suggest?"Emily asked.
"Nothing--at present."
"If my aunt fails us,have we no other hope?""I have hope in Mrs.Rook,"Alban answered."I see I surprise you;but I really mean what I say.Sir Jervis's housekeeper is an excitable woman,and she is fond of wine.There is always a weak side in the character of such a person as that.If we wait for our chance,and turn it to the right use when it comes,we may yet succeed in ****** her betray herself."Emily listened to him in bewilderment.
"You talk as if I was sure of your help in the future,"she said.
"Have you forgotten that I leave school to-day,never to return?
In half an hour more,I shall be condemned to a long journey in the company of that horrible creature--with a life to look forward to,in the same house with her,among strangers!Amiserable prospect,and a hard trial of a girl's courage--is it not,Mr.Morris?""You will at least have one person,Miss Emily,who will try with all his heart and soul to encourage you.""What do you mean?"
"I mean,"said Alban,quietly,"that the Midsummer vacation begins to-day;and that the drawing-master is going to spend his holidays in the North."Emily jumped up from her chair."You!"she exclaimed."Youare going to Northumberland?With me?""Why not?"Alban asked."The railway is open to all travelers alike,if they have money enough to buy a ticket.""Mr.Morris!what canyou be thinking of?Indeed,indeed,I am not ungrateful.I know you mean kindly--you are a good,generous man.But do remember how completely a girl,in my position,is at the mercy of appearances.You,traveling in the same carriage with me!and that woman putting her own vile interpretation on it,and degrading me in Sir Jervis Redwood's estimation,on the day when I enter his house!Oh,it's worse than thoughtless--it's madness,downright madness.""You are quite right,"Alban gravely agreed,"it ismadness.Ilost whatever little reason I once possessed,Miss Emily,on the day when I first met you out walking with the young ladies of the school."Emily turned away in significant silence.Alban followed her.
"You promised just now,"he said,"never to think unjustly of me again.I respect and admire you far too sincerely to take a base advantage of this occasion--the only occasion on which I have been permitted to speak with you alone.Wait a little before you condemn a man whom you don't understand.I will say nothing to annoy you--I only ask leave to explain myself.Will you take your chair again?"She returned unwillingly to her seat."It can only end,"she thought,sadly,"in my disappointing him!""I have had the worst possible opinion of women for years past,"Alban resumed;"and the only reason I can give for it condemns me out of my own mouth.I have been infamously treated by one woman;and my wounded self-esteem has meanly revenged itself by reviling the whole ***.Wait a little,Miss Emily.My fault has received its fit punishment.I have been thoroughly humiliated--and youhave done it."
"Mr.Morris!"
"Take no offense,pray,where no offense is meant.Some few years since it was the great misfortune of my life to meet with a Jilt.
You know what I mean?"
"Yes."
"She was my equal by birth (I am a younger son of a country squire),and my superior in rank.I can honestly tell you that Iwas fool enough to love her with all my heart and soul.She never allowed me to doubt--I may say this without conceit,remembering the miserable end of it--that my feeling for her was returned.
Her father and mother (excellent people)approved of the contemplated marriage.She accepted my presents;she allowed all the customary preparations for a wedding to proceed to completion;she had not even mercy en ough,or shame enough,to prevent me from publicly degrading myself by waiting for her at the altar,in the presence of a large congregation.The minutes passed--and no bride appeared.The clergyman,waiting like me,was requested to return to the vestry.I was invited to follow him.You foresee the end of the story,of course?She had run away with another man.But can you guess who the man was?Her groom!"Emily's face reddened with indignation."She suffered for it?Oh,Mr.Morris,surely she suffered for it?""Not at all.She had money enough to reward the groom for marrying her;and she let herself down easily to her husband's level.It was a suitable marriage in every respect.When I last heard of them,they were regularly in the habit of getting drunk together.I am afraid I have disgusted you?We will drop the subject,and resume my precious autobiography at a later date.
One showery day in the autumn of last year,you young ladies went out with Miss Ladd for a walk.When you were all trotting back again,under your umbrellas,did you (in particular)notice an ill-tempered fellow standing in the road,and getting a good look at you,on the high footpath above him?"Emily smiled,in spite of herself."I don't remember it,"she said.