How they would bow and bend, if I were called Louisa of Hesse-Darmstadt, and the lawful wife of the prince! Did they not also bend and bow before the first wife, Elizabeth von Braunschweig, [Footnote: The first wife of Prince Frederick William of Prussia was the Princess Elizabeth von Braunschweig, the niece of Frederick the Great. The crown prince was scarcely twenty-one years of age when betrothed to her. After four years they were separated, on account of the improper conduct of the princess, who was banished to Stettin. There she lived until her death in 1840, after seventy-one years of imprisonment. Never during these seventy-one years had the Princess "Lisbeth," as she was called, dared to leave Stettin. There she was obliged to amuse herself. Her concerts and evening entertainments were celebrated. The second wife of the crown prince of Prussia was Louisa of Hesse-Darmstadt, the mother of Frederick William III. She died in 1805.] although every one knew of her shameful conduct--knew of her intrigues with lackeys and common soldiers? Do they not now bow before her, although she is banished to Stettin for her infamous conduct, and lives there a prisoner? Afine imprisonment that! The whole town is her prison, and when she appears in public every one stands upon the street to salute the crown princess of Prussia. But when they see me they pass carelessly by, or they look at me with a contemptuous laugh, and fancy themselves miracles of virtue, and free from sin. My only crime is that my father was not a prince, and that I am of low birth. Am I to blame for that--to blame that the man whom I love, and who loves me, cannot marry me and make me his lawful wife?""Ho! gee, ho!" cried the driver to his horses. "Get up!" The troops had passed, the highway was now free, and uninterrupted rolled the heavy, creaking wagon into Berlin. Within all was quiet. The two children and nurse were asleep. The driver was half asleep, his head hung shaking about; only now and then he started to give his horses a crack, which the thin, wheezing animals did not heed in the least.
Wilhelmine alone slept not; in her soul there was no quiet, no peace. She grumbled at fate, and at mankind. An unspeakable anxiety seized her for the immediate future, and fear of the king's anger.
As the sun was setting they reached Berlin, and were entering the town, when the guard, in royal livery, sprang through the gate, calling, in a loud voice, to the wagon, "Halt--halt! Turn out the way!" Then was heard the call of the sentinel, and the roll of the drums. An equipage, drawn by six black steeds, drove past. A pale, young wife, splendidly attired, leaned back in the carriage, and the little flag-bearer, Prince Frederick William, was by her side; on the seat opposite sat the second son, Prince Louis, and the lord steward. In this beautiful equipage drove the Princess of Prussia;at her side, in a miserable linen-covered wagon, crouching far in the corner, sat Wilhelmine Enke, the rival of the princess; near her, her two children, whose existence condemned her, and stamped her life with dishonor. Like a dream the brilliant apparition rushed past Wilhelmine, and it haunted her through the long streets, to the humble home where she sought a temporary refuge. And when finally alone, in her own room, where no one could spy into her face, nor understand her words, there broke forth from her soul a long-repressed wrong. She stood erect; a proud, insolent smile played around her mouth. "I am his wife, too; I alone am his beloved wife,"said she, with a loud, triumphant voice, "and my children are his only truly-beloved children, for they are those of his love. How proudly she drove past me! How beautiful is her pale face, and how interesting her sad smile! She in sunlight, and I in shade! She knows that I am her rival, but she is not mine. No, the Princess of Prussia cannot rival Wilhelmine Enke. I have no fear of her. But the king I have to fear," cried she suddenly, shrinking with terror. In the meeting with the princess she had forgotten him, her anguish, her anxiety for the future. All were forgotten for the moment--to be recalled with renewed terror.
"Thank Heaven," she said, "I have escaped. For the moment I am safe!
What will the prince do, when he finds that we have fled from Potsdam? Will he divine where we have gone? Will he come to seek me?
If he still loves me--if I am really the happy rival of his wife and every other court lady--yes, then he will come. Then he will know where to find his Wilhelmine. But if it is true, what malicious people have repeated to me, with feigned sympathy, that the prince loves another--that he has withdrawn his love from me, is indifferent and cold--then he will not seek me; then I shall remain here alone!--alone, with my children, this long, fearful night!
What, then, if I am alone? No, oh, no! I will not believe that I am forsaken. These are wicked thoughts which haunt me--only the agitation of this dreadful day, which imagination has overwrought.
Rise up and be strong! Go to thy children," said she, "and read in their eyes that he can never leave thee!"Forcing herself to composure, she sought her children; found Louisa humming and singing her little boy to sleep, and her daughter nodding, on a low stool at her feet.
"Come, my child, I will put you to sleep," said the mother, lifting her in her arms. "Your mother will make your bed softly. When you sleep and speak with the angels, intercede for us all."With tender care she undressed her and bore her gently in her arms to her bed, and, kneeling before it, breathed a prayer over her sleeping child; then bent over the cradle of her son, blessing and kissing him. "Sleep my boy, sleep. I know not that I shall ever see thy beautiful eyes open again--whether I shall ever again press thee to my heart. Who can tell if they may not come this very night to remove me to prison--to punish me for you, my children, my beloved children!--Be calm, be calm! I shall remain here until morning, at least," added she.
She turned to the nurse, who, with anxious face and folded hands, stood at the farthest corner of the room. "Go, now, Louisa--go, and take something to eat. You must be hungry and tired. Buy at the next store what you need; but do not stop to talk with any one or repeat my name. Then return quickly, and take care of the children. Do not trouble yourself about me--I need nothing more.""But you must eat something, mamselle; you must have some supper!"Wilhelmine shook her head, refusing, and returned quickly to her own room.