书城公版Sir Gibbie
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第94章

He took his book from the grass, and read, in a chant, or rather in a lilt, the Danish ballad of Chyld Dyring, as translated by Sir Walter Scott.Gibbie's eyes grew wider and wider as he listened;their pupils dilated, and his lips parted: it seemed as if his soul were looking out of door and windows at once--but a puzzled soul that understood nothing of what it saw.Yet plainly, either the sounds, or the thought-matter vaguely operative beyond the line where intelligence begins, or, it may be, the sparkle of individual word or phrase islanded in a chaos of rhythmic motion, wrought somehow upon him, for his attention was fixed as by a spell.When Donal ceased, he remained open-mouthed and motionless for a time;then, drawing himself slidingly over the grass to Donal's feet, he raised his head and peeped above his knees at the book.A moment only he gazed, and drew back with a hungry sigh: he had seen nothing in the book like what Donal had been drawing from it--as if one should look into the well of which he had just drunk, and see there nothing but dry pebbles and sand! The wind blew gentle, the sun shone bright, all nature closed softly round the two, and the soul whose children they were was nearer than the one to the other, nearer than sun or wind or daisy or Chyld Dyring.To his amazement, Donal saw the tears gathering in Gibbie's eyes.He was as one who gazes into the abyss of God's will--sees only the abyss, cannot see the will, and weeps.The child in whom neither cold nor hunger nor nakedness nor loneliness could move a throb of self-pity, was moved to tears that a loveliness, to him strange and unintelligible, had passed away, and he had no power to call it back.

"Wad ye like to hear't again?" asked Donal, more than half understanding him instinctively.

Gibbie's face answered with a flash, and Donal read the poem again, and Gibbie's delight returned greater than before, for now something like a dawn began to appear among the cloudy words.Donal read it a third time, and closed the book, for it was almost the hour for driving the cattle home.He had never yet seen, and perhaps never again did see, such a look of thankful devotion on human countenance as met his lifted eyes.

How much Gibbie even then understood of the lovely eerie old ballad, it is impossible for me to say.Had he a glimmer of the return of the buried mother? Did he think of his own? I doubt if he had ever thought that he had a mother; but he may have associated the tale with his father, and the boots he was always making for him.

Certainly it was the beginning of much.But the waking up of a human soul to know itself in the mirror of its thoughts and feelings, its loves and delights, oppresses me with so heavy a sense of marvel and inexplicable mystery, that when I imagine myself such as Gibbie then was, I cannot imagine myself coming awake.I can hardly believe that, from being such as Gibbie was the hour before he heard the ballad, I should ever have come awake.Yet here I am, capable of pleasure unspeakable from that and many another ballad, old and new! somehow, at one time or another, or at many times in one, I have at last come awake! When, by slow filmy unveilings, life grew clearer to Gibbie, and he not only knew, but knew that he knew, his thoughts always went back to that day in the meadow with Donal Grant as the beginning of his knowledge of beautiful things in the world of man.Then first he saw nature reflected, Narcissus-like, in the mirror of her humanity, her highest self.

But when or how the change in him began, the turn of the balance, the first push towards life of the evermore invisible germ--of that he remained, much as he wondered, often as he searched his consciousness, as ignorant to the last as I am now.Sometimes he was inclined to think the glory of the new experience must have struck him dazed, and that was why he could not recall what went on in him at the time.

Donal rose and went driving the cattle home, and Gibbie lay where he had again thrown himself upon the grass.When he lifted his head, Donal and the cows had vanished.

Donal had looked all round as he left the meadow, and seeing the boy nowhere, had concluded he had gone to his people.The impression he had made upon him faded a little during the evening.For when he reached home, and had watered them, he had to tie up the animals, each in its stall, and make it comfortable for the night; next, eat his own supper; then learn a proposition of Euclid, and go to bed.