Besides the Abbe de Boufflers, by whom I was not beloved, and Madam de Boufflers, in whose opinion I was guilty of that which neither women nor authors ever pardon, the other friends of Madam de Luxembourg never seemed much disposed to become mine, particularly the President Henault, who, enrolled amongst authors, was not exempt from their weaknesses; also Madam du Deffand and Mademoiselle de Lespinasse, both intimate with Voltaire and the friends of D'Alembert, with whom the latter at length.lived; however upon an honorable footing, for it cannot be understood I mean otherwise.I first began to interest myself for Madam du Deffand, whom the loss of her eyes made an object of commiseration in mine; but her manner of living, so contrary to my own, that her hour of going to bed was almost mine for rising; her unbounded passion for low wit, the importance she gave to every kind of printed trash, either complimentary or abusive, the despotism and transports of her oracles, her excessive admiration or dislike of everything, which did not permit her to speak upon any subject without convulsions, her inconceivable prejudices, invincible obstinacy, and the enthusiasm of folly to which this carried her in her passionate judgments; all disgusted me and diminished the attention I wished to pay her.I neglected her and she perceived it; this was enough to set her in a rage, and, although I was sufficiently aware how much a woman of her character was to be feared, I preferred exposing myself to the scourge of her hatred rather than to that of her friendship.
My having so few friends in the society of Madam de Luxembourg would not have been in the least dangerous had I had no enemies in her family.Of these I had but one, who, in my then situation, was as powerful as a hundred.It certainly was not M.de Villeroy, her brother; for he not only came to see me, but had several times invited me to Villeroy; and as I had answered to the invitation with all possible politeness and respect, he had taken my vague manner of doing it as a consent, and arranged with Madam de Luxembourg a journey of a fortnight, in which it was proposed to me to make one of the party.As the cares my health then required did not permit me to go from home without risk, I prayed Madam de Luxembourg to have the goodness to make my apologies.Her answer proves this was done with all possible ease, and M.de Villeroy still continued to show me his usual marks of goodness.His nephew and heir, the young Marquis of Villeroy, had not for me the same benevolence, nor had I for him the respect I had for his uncle.His hare-brained manner rendered him insupportable to me, and my coldness drew upon me his aversion.He insultingly attacked me one evening at table, and I had the worst of it because I am a fool, without presence of mind; and because anger, instead of rendering my wit more poignant, deprives me of the little Ihave.I had a dog which had been given me when he was quite young, soon after my arrival at the Hermitage, and which I had called Duke.
This dog, not handsome, but rare of his kind, of which I had made my companion and friend, a title he certainly merited much more than most of the persons by whom it was taken, became in great request at the castle of Montmorency for his good nature and fondness, and the attachment we had to each other; but from a foolish pusillanimity Ihad changed his name to Turk, as if there were not many dogs called Marquis, without giving the least offense to any marquis whatsoever.
The Marquis de Villeroy, who knew of this change of name, attacked me in such a manner that I was obliged openly at table to relate what I had done.Whatever there might be offensive in the name of duke, it was not in my having given, but in my having taken it away.
The worst of it all was, there were many dukes present, amongst others M.de Luxembourg and his son; and the Marquis de Villeroy, who was one day to have, and now has that tide, enjoyed in the most cruel manner the embarrassment into which he had thrown me.I was told the next day his aunt had severely reprimanded him, and it may be judged whether or not, supposing her to have been serious, this put me upon better terms with him.
To enable me to support his enmity I had no person, neither at the Hotel de Luxembourg nor at the Temple, except the Chevalier de Lorenzi, who professed himself my friend; but he was more that of D'Alembert, under whose protection he passed with women for a great geometrician.He was moreover the cicisbeo, or rather the complaisant chevalier of the Countess of Boufflers, a great friend also to D'Alembert, and the Chevalier de Lorenzi was the most passive instrument in her hands.Thus, far from having in that circle any counterbalance to my inaptitude, to keep me in the good graces of Madam de Luxembourg, everybody who approached her seemed to concur in adjuring me in her opinion.Yet, besides Emile, with which she charged herself, she gave me at the same time another mark of her benevolence, which made me imagine that, although wearied with my conversation, she would still preserve for me the friendship she had so many times promised me for life.