书城公版THE CONFESSIONS
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第86章 [1732-1736](16)

Though this mischance had rather damped my musical ardor, I did not leave off studying my Rameau, and, by repeated efforts, was at length able to understand it, and to make some little attempts at composition, the success of which encouraged me to proceed.The Count de Bellegarde, son to the Marquis of Antremont, had returned from Dresden after the death of King Augustus.Having long resided at Paris, he was fond of music, and particularly that of Rameau.His brother, the Count of Nangis, played on the violin; the Countess de la Tour, their sister sung tolerably; this rendered music the fashion at Chambery, and a kind of public concert was established there, the direction of which was at first designed for me, but they soon discovered I was not competent to the undertaking, and it was otherwise arranged.Notwithstanding this, I continued writing a number of little pieces, in my own way, and, among others, a cantata, which gained great approbation; it could not, indeed, be called a finished piece, but the airs were written in a style of novelty, and produced a good effect, which was not expected from me.These gentlemen could not believe that, reading music so indifferently, it was possible I should compose any that was passable, and made no doubt that I had taken to myself the credit of some other person's labors.Monsieur de Nangis, wishing to be assured of this, called on me one morning with a cantata of Clerambault's which he had transposed, as he said, to suit his voice, and to which another bass was necessary, the transposition having rendered that of Clerambault impracticable.I answered, it required considerable labor, and could not be done on the spot.

Being convinced I only sought an excuse, he pressed me to write at least the bass to a recitative: I did so, not well, doubtless, because to attempt anything with success I must have both time and *******, but I did it at least according to rule, and he being present, could not doubt but I understood the elements of composition.I did not, therefore, lose my scholars, though it hurt my pride that there should be a concert at Chambery in which I was not necessary.

About this time, peace being concluded, the French army repassed the Alps.Several officers came to visit Madam de Warrens, and among others the Count de Lautrec, Colonel of the regiment of Orleans, since Plenipotentiary of Geneva, and afterwards Marshal of France, to whom she presented me.On her recommendation, he appeared to interest himself greatly in my behalf, promising a great deal, which he never remembered till the last year of his life, when no longer stood in need of his assistance.The young Marquis of Sennecterre, whose father was then ambassador at Turin, passed through Chambery at the same time, and dined one day at Madam de Menthon's, when I happened to be among the guests.After dinner, the discourse turned on music, which the marquis understood extremely well.The opera of Jephtha was then new; he mentioned this piece, it was brought him, and he made me tremble by proposing to execute it between us.He opened the book at that celebrated double chorus,La Terre, l' Enfer, le Ciel meme Tout tremble devant le Seigneur.** The Earth, and Hell, and Heaven itself, tremble before the Lord.

He said, "How many parts will you take? I will do these six." Ihad not yet been accustomed to this trait of French vivacity, and though acquainted with divisions, could not comprehend how one man could undertake to perform six, or even two parts at the same time.

Nothing has cost me more trouble in music than to skip lightly from one part to another, and have the eye at once on a whole division.

By the manner in which I evaded this trial, he must have been inclined to believe I did not understand music, and perhaps it was to satisfy himself in this particular that he proposed my noting a song for Mademoiselle de Menthon, in such a manner that I could not avoid it.

He sang this song, and I wrote from his voice, without giving him much trouble to repeat it.When finished he read my performance, and said (which was very true) that it was very correctly noted.He had observed my embarrassment, and now seemed to enhance the merit of this little success.In reality, I then understood music very well, and only wanted that quickness at first sight which I possess in no one particular, and which is only to be acquired in this art by long and constant practice.Be that as it may, I was fully sensible of his kindness in endeavoring to efface from the minds of others, and even from my own, the embarrassment I had experienced on this occasion.

Twelve or fifteen years afterwards, meeting this gentleman at several houses in Paris, I was tempted to make him recollect this anecdote, and show him I still remembered it; but he had lost his sight since that time; I feared to give him pain by recalling to his memory how useful it formerly had been to him, and was therefore silent on that subject.

I now touch on the moment that binds my past existence to the present, some friendships of that period, prolonged to the present time, being very dear to me, have frequently made me regret that happy obscurity, when those who called themselves my friends were really so;loved me for myself, through pure good will, and not from the vanity of being acquainted with a conspicuous character, perhaps for the secret purpose of finding more occasions to injure him.