It' s been ten years since that visit and eight years since Beau died in my arms from a stroke. Love has many ways of showing its face. Each time I am ready to walk away from a person on whom I' ve given up, I am reminded of the power of Beau loves persistence with Katherine and with me. If Beau can give an extra ten minutes, surely I can too.
每周一下午2点,我和博都要去密尔沃基东北部的银泉康复中心,为住在那里的老人们进行一小时的宠物治疗。我们穿过走廊走向接待室,与每位相遇的人打招呼。在接待室里休养的人都会过来爱抚博—— 一只活泼可爱的德国短毛猎犬。他今年10岁,体重99磅,很招人喜欢。你们很难想象,8年前,这只狗来到我家门阶上,被打得伤痕累累,一见到人就吓得仰躺在地,四脚朝天,抬起腿来就撒尿,直到人们抚摸他,柔声细语地安慰他,他才会有安全感。
在我们第一次拜访康复中心,路经淡黄色的1号走廊时,从112号房间里传出一位老人激动的声音,带着浓重的德国口音:“玛,玛,来了一条德国狗!这里,有只德国狗!”
随即,一位皱纹满面、约6英尺高的白发瘦高老人出现在门口,他张开有力的双臂,伸出大手,邀我们进去。“我是查理,这是我的妻子埃玛。请进,请进。”
博听到查理友好、热情的声音,立刻激动得身子习惯性地晃个不停,摆出贴近你的大腿的姿势,等着你爱抚他,查理立即满足了他的愿望。我们进了屋,看见有着紫罗兰色头发的埃玛坐在床上,她80多岁了,虽然瘦弱但精力充沛。她笑着用手拍打床,只拍了一下,拴着皮带、向来顺从的博就跳上床,躺在她的身边,舔她的脸。查理告诉我们,“二战”期间他俩从德国移民到英国,不得不忍痛割爱,把德国短毛猎犬马克斯留在那里。说到这里,埃玛满眼泪水。查理说,博长得和马克斯简直一模一样。
隔壁114房住的是70多岁的老太太凯瑟琳,几个月前她就不与别人说话了,近一个月以来她都坐在轮椅上,始终处于紧张性精神分裂状态。任何关心、拥抱、谈心或陪伴都无法打动她。我和博走进她的房间时,床边的小灯亮着,遮阳窗帘拉着,她背对着我们,低头垂肩地坐在轮椅上,面朝看不到任何风景的窗子。
博用套着他的皮带拽着我向前走去。我还没来得及蹲到凯瑟琳面前,博已经站在她的左侧,并把头靠在她的膝盖上。我拉过一把椅子坐在她跟前并向她问好,但她没有反应。我和博在那里坐了15分钟,而凯瑟琳一言未发,也一动未动。这使我很吃惊,而令我更吃惊的是,博把长长的下巴搭在凯瑟琳的膝盖上,竟一动不动地站了整整15分钟。
要是你了解博,就会知道他为得到一次爱抚,能等上10秒钟就已经很难得了。但这次是个例外,他把头贴在凯瑟琳的膝盖上,和她一样僵在那里。与这个毫无生气的女人在一起让我感到极不舒服。一到两点半,我就匆忙地说“再见”,然后站起身来,拉着不愿离开的博往外走。
我问一位护士,为什么凯瑟琳会得这种紧张性精神分裂症,她告诉我:“我们也不知为什么。有时候老人被家人嫌弃时,他们就会得这种病,我们只能尽力让他们感到舒心。”
所有使我能幸福生活的善良的人和动物都浮现在眼前,而后又消失了。我能想象得到凯瑟琳此刻的心情:孤单、烦乱、绝望,甚至被人遗忘。我决心找寻一种方法去读懂她的心。
从那以后,每周一我和博去接待室时,都会特意去112房探视查理和埃玛,还要去114房陪伴凯瑟琳。每次都如此——查理挥手邀我们进屋,埃玛拍床等博去舔她,两人对此总是不亦乐乎。然后我们去凯瑟琳的房间——她总是无精打采地坐在那里,除了还有呼吸外,几乎没有一点儿其他的生命迹象。
每次我都试着和凯瑟琳说话,可她一直没反应。我越来越失去兴致了,我不甘心只是跟她待在一起。博却一如既往,每次探访凯瑟琳,博都会“坐禅”15分钟,教我如何“陪伴”凯瑟琳。
第四次去康复中心时,我打算绕过凯瑟琳的房间,可是博却有自己的主意,他把我拽了进去,跟前几次一样,他把头搭在她的膝盖上,待在她的左侧。我默许了,可是心里盘算着那天下午晚些时候的商务会谈,因此我决定把陪凯瑟琳的时间从以往的15分钟缩短为5分钟。我没吭声,只是默默地坐在那里,一门心思地想着即将开始的会谈。凯瑟琳肯定没有注意,也不会在意。可是我起身要拽走博的时候,他却纹丝不动。
接下来,奇迹发生了——凯瑟琳把手放到了博的头上,没有别的举动,只是她的手。博既没有像往常那样用鼻子蹭,也没有越发用力地摇晃身子,他仍然纹丝不动,像雕塑一样站在那里。
我又坐了下来,心中有说不出的震惊。随后在那宝贵的10分钟里,我感受着凯瑟琳的手和博的头之间那种生命之源的沟通。时钟在两点半时响了,我们的15分钟到了,此时凯瑟琳的手缓慢地移回膝上,博也转身走出房间。
那次探访已经过去了10年,博在8年前因中风死在我的怀里。爱有多种表达方式,每一次因我对某人感到失望而准备离开时,都会想起博对凯瑟琳和对我那坚贞不渝的爱。既然博能耐心再多待10分钟,那么我坚信我也能。
戈登塞特犬【Gordon Setter】
聪明、忠诚、自信,有着强烈的狩猎嗜好,是工作在田野上的猎犬。
产 地:英国
概 述:戈登塞特犬身体健壮、肌肉结实、意志坚强,能经受严格的训练;它还具有好奇心强、爱挑衅的性格。不过,它并不任性,对主人很忠诚,服从主人的指令。它很聪明,那闪耀着智慧的神情似乎能够窥视到主人内心的喜怒哀乐。
therapy [' erpi] n. 疗法
What therapy can diabetes person take?
糖尿病人应该吃些什么来治疗这种病?
frenzy [' frenzi] n. 狂暴;狂怒
The people were whipped up into a frenzy by the news.
人们听了这个消息群情激奋。
catatonic [,k鎡' tnik] n. 紧张性精神症患者
I asked one of the doctor why Kate was catatonic.
我问一个医生为什么凯特会得紧张性精神分裂症。
reluctant [ri' lktnt] adj. 不情愿的;勉强的
They would be very reluctant to postpone the meeting.
他们不愿意推迟这个会议。
所有使我能幸福生活的善良的人和动物都浮现在眼前,而后又消失了。
我决心找寻一种方法去读懂她的心。
每一次因我对某人感到失望而准备离开时,都会想起博对凯瑟琳和对我那坚贞不渝的爱。
She was sitting in her wheelchair, her back toward us, slouched over, facing the viewless window.
slouch over:懒散
Each visit I attempted to engage Katherine in conversation.
attempt to:企图(努力)
爱的守候
A Dog' s Last Will
佚名 / Anonymous
When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad", you' d shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?"—but then you' d relent, and roll me over for a belly rub.
My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect. We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs", you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.
Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love. She, now your wife, is not a "dog person"—still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy.
Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love". As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch—because your touch was now so infrequent—and I would have defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.