There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog", and you resented every expenditure on my behalf. Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You' ve made the right decision for your "family", but there was a time when I was your only family.
I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her". They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers". You had to pry your son' s fingers loose from my collar, as he screamed , "No, Daddy. Please don' t let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.
You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked , "How could you?"
They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you—that you had changed your mind—that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me. When I realized I could not compete with the frolicing for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited.
I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood. She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured, "How could you?"
Perhaps because she understood my dog speak, she said "I' m so sorry". She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn' t be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself—a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place.
And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her. It was you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.
当我还是一只小狗的时候，我的顽皮总会给你带来快乐，让你开怀大笑。你称我为孩子，虽然家里的许多鞋子和靠枕被我啃咬得破烂不堪，你依然把我看做你最好的朋友。无论何时我做了“坏”事，你都会摇摇手指对我说：“你怎么能这样呢？”不过，最终你都会原谅我的，还把我扑倒揉搓我的肚皮。
我改掉乱啃东西的坏习惯所需的时间比预期的要长，因为你一直都比较忙，但你仍然努力帮我改掉这个坏习惯。我仍记得那些夜晚，我总跳到你的床上，用鼻子拱你，倾听你的心里话和秘密梦想，那时的我觉得生活美好得近乎完美。我们常去公园散步，追逐嬉戏，乘车兜风，偶尔停下来买根雪糕吃（我只能吃到雪糕筒，因为你说“雪糕对狗狗的身体有害”）。每天我都会长时间地在太阳底下打盹，迎接你傍晚回家。
渐渐地，你将更多的时间花在工作和事业上，并花更多的时间去寻找你的另一半。而我总是耐心地等你回来，在你心碎绝望时给你慰藉，且从不对你的坏决定加以责备。每天我都欢快地蹦跳着迎接你回家。随后你与她坠入爱河，她就是你现在的妻子。她不是个“爱狗之人”，但我还是欢迎她来到我们家，努力表达我的感情，并顺从她。因为看到你幸福我感到很开心。
后来你们添了几个孩子，我也与你们一同分享喜悦。我被他们粉红的脸蛋和香甜的气息深深地吸引了，我也想像母亲一样好好照顾他们。然而你们夫妇俩担心我会弄伤他们，大部分时间都把我关在另一个房间里，甚至关进笼子里。唉，我多想好好爱他们啊，然而我成了“爱的囚徒”。随着他们逐渐长大，我成了他们的好朋友。他们喜欢拽着我的毛，蹒跚地站起来，喜欢用手指戳我的眼睛，喜欢研究我的耳朵，也喜欢亲吻我的鼻子。我喜欢他们的一切，特别是他们的抚摸——因为你现在已经很少碰我了——如果需要，我愿意付出生命的代价去保护他们。我会偷偷溜上他们的床，倾听他们的忧虑和梦想，和他们一起等着你的汽车开进家里的车道。
曾几何时，当人们问你是否养狗时，你总要掏出钱包里我的照片，向他们讲述我的故事。可是近些年，你却只是简单地回答“有”，即刻转移话题。我已经从“你的狗狗”沦落成了“只是一只狗”了，你甚至会为花在我身上的每分钱而生气。如今，你的事业有了新的转机，你们要到另一个城市去，并且搬进一幢不准养宠物的公寓里。你为“家庭”利益做出了重要的抉择，但是我曾是你唯一的家人啊！
我兴奋地坐在你的车子里，直到到了一家动物收容所我才恍然大悟。那里到处充溢着猫儿狗儿的气味，还有令人恐惧和绝望的气息。你填好了表格，对那里的人说：“我知道你们会给她找个好归宿的。”他们耸耸肩，露出了为难的表情。他们清楚地知道一只已近中年的狗将要面临的现实，即使她的各种证件齐全。你不得不掰开你儿子紧抓着我项圈的手指，任凭他哭喊着：“不要！爸爸，求求你别让他们把我的狗带走！”我很担心他，因为你刚刚教过他关于友情、忠诚、爱与责任以及对一切生命的尊重。
你避开我的目光，轻轻地拍了拍我的头说了句“再见”，并礼貌地拒绝将我的项圈和皮带拿走。我知道你急着走，而今我也知道自己的大限将至。你走后，两位善良的女士说或许你几个月前就知道自己要搬家了，却并未试着给我找个好人家。她们摇摇头说：“你怎么能那样呢？”
这里的人每天都忙得不可开交，但只要一有空闲，他们就会尽心照顾我们。我在这里不愁吃喝，可是几天来一直没有胃口。最初，每每有人经过笼子时，我都会满心欢喜地冲向前，希望来的人是你——希望是你回心转意来接我回去——希望这一切不过是一场噩梦……或许至少让我知道是有人关心我，有人愿意把我拯救出去。当我意识到与那些嬉笑打闹的小狗争宠，永远也不可能占据上风时，我便退至僻远的角落，默默地等待着即将到来的命运，而他们，对自己将要面对的命运显然一无所知。
一天傍晚，我听到她向我走来，而后我蹑手蹑脚地尾随在她身后，穿过长廊，进入一个静得出奇的单间。她把我放在一张桌子上，揉捏着我的耳朵，告诉我不要担心。我已经料到将要发生的事情，我的心因此猛烈地跳动起来，同时也有一种解脱的感觉。“爱之囚徒”的有生之日已经所剩无几了，本性使然，我更加关心起她来。我感觉得到她承受的巨大压力，就像我能感知到你的每种心情一样。她温柔地把我的前腿绑上止血带，此时的她已经泪盈满颊。我温柔地舔着她的手，就像多年以前，在你忧伤的时候我给你安慰一样。然后，她娴熟地把注射器插入我的静脉。一阵刺痛后，一股冷流涌遍我的周身。我昏昏沉沉地躺下了，看着她善良的双眼，我呢喃道：“你怎么能这样呢？”